THE ABSENT-MINDED PROFESSOR


I once knew a man whose memory was very god. Richard Rudd was so forgetful that he sometimes forgot what he was talking about in the middle of a sentence. His wife had to constantly remind him about his appointments, his classes-even his meals! Since Rudd was a professor at a well-known university, his forgetfulness was often an embarrassment. It wasn’t that he was unintelligent, as same critikal people tended to gossip. He was just very, very absent-minded.
One hot summer’s day, professor Rudd decided to take his children to the beach. The seaside town he planned to visit was about three-hour train ride away. To make the trip interesting for his young children, he kept the name of the own a secret. Unfortunately, by the time Rudd had arrived at the train station, the poor forgetful man had forgotten the name of his destination himself. Luckily, a friend of his happend to be in the station. He offered to take care of the children while Rudd went back home to find out where he was going.
The professor’s wife was surprised to see him again so soon, but she was amused when she heard what was the matter. She distrusted his memory, so she wrote the name of the town on a piece of paper. Satisfied that she had solved the problem, she sent her husband off again. Ten minutes later she was astonished to see him outside the hous again. The professor had forgotten where had left his children.

(Take from New Horizons in English)

Thank You for the attention!!!

Iklan

“SCHOOL DAZE”


It was at the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her students the florist’s son handed her a gift. Se sook it, held it overhead, and said “I bet I know what it is flower” “That’s right” the boy said.
“But how did you know?” “Oh, just a wild guest, “She said. The next pupil was the candy shop owner’s daughter. The teacher held her gilt overhead, shook it, and said, “I bet I can guess what it is. A box of sweets. “That’s right, but how did you know?
Asked the girl. Oh, just a lucky
Gues said the teacher.
The next girl was from the son of the liquor store owner. The teacher held the packade overhead, but it was leaking. She touched a drop of the leakage with her finger.
And licked it. Is it wine? She asked no, the boy replied, with some excitement.
The teacher repeated the proses, taking a large drop of the leakage to her tongue. Is it champagne? She asked No, the boy replied, with more excitement. The teacher took one more taste before declaring I give up what is it?
With gread happiness, the boy replied, it’s a puppy!

THE LION AND THE HARE


Once upon a time, the lion has been hunting for days without catching something to eat.
“Looks like I’ll be hungry again!“ he thought.
Then he saw a rabbit fast asleep under a shady tree. He moved silently toward it, thinking, “Finally this is a delicious dish which sits and waits for me!“
He’s about to catch a rabbit when a young deer from both trot. The lion is thinking, “Now there’s a better dinner!“. He turned around and chasing deer. Voice wake rabbit and she quickly jumped away.
After a long chase, a lion fails to capture the deer. Very tired she went back looking for rabbits, but found that they had fled.
“What a stupid I am!“ lion was said to be a growling stomach is empty.
“That’s a good time to serve food that I almost lost mine, just for the change of getting more!”

THE ZOO JOB STORY


One day a clown was visiting the zoo and attempted to earn some money by making a street performance. He acted and mimed perfectly some animal acts. As soon as he started to drive a crowd, a zoo keeper grabbed him and dragged him into his office. The zoo keeper explained to the clown that the zoo’s most popular gorilla had died suddenly and the keeper was fear that attendance at the zoo would fall off. So he offered the clown a job to dress up as the gorilla until the zoo could get another one. The clown accepted this great opportunity.
So the next morning the clown put on the gorilla suit and entered the cage before the crowd came. He felt that it was a great job. He could sleep all he wanted, played and made fun of people and he drove bigger crowds than he ever did as a clown. He pretended the gorilla successfully.
However, eventually the crowds were tired of him for just swinging on tires. He began to notice that the people were paying more attention to the lion in the next cage. Not wanting to lose the attention of his audience, he decided to make a spectacular performance. He climbed to the top of his cage, crawled across a partition, and dangled from the top to the lion’s cage. Of course, this made the lion furious, but the crowd people loved it.
At the end of the day the zoo keeper came and gave him a raise for being such a good attraction. Well, this went on for some time, he kept taunting the lion, the audience crowd grew a larger, and his salary kept going up. Then one terrible day happened. When he was dangling over the furious lion, he slipped and fell into the lion cage. The clown was really in big terrible situation. He was terrified.
Sooner the lion gathered itself and prepared to pounce. The clown was so scared. He could do nothing and he began to run round and round the cage with the lion close and closer behind. Finally, the lion could catch him. The clown started screaming and yelling, “Help me, help me!”, but the lion was quick and pounces. The clown soon found himself flat on his back looking up at the angry lion and suddenly he heard a voice from the lion’s mouth; “Shut up you idiot! Do you want to get us both fired?”